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The 36 Questions That Lead to Love

On January 9th in 2015, The New York Times published an essay by Daniel Jones. Titled “The 36 Questions That Lead to Love” the Modern Love column provides readers with the three dozen questions that psychologist Arthur Aron believes can accelerate intimacy between two strangers.

It soon became a tool in every single girl’s arsenal to landing a man, including Glamour’s infamous Engagement Chicken. For myself, after many years of countless dates, random rendezvous, swiping left or right, and various attempts at building relationships with unavailable men, I think my dating life may fall into the “it’s not them, it’s you” category. And then there are the numerous hours that I’ve spent at my therapist’s office where we discuss my challenges with vulnerability. So perhaps it’s time to answer these 36 Questions That Lead to Love for myself. Give pause to dating and get to know myself better, because as Jones writes, “to be vulnerable (with another person) can be exceedingly difficult, so this exercise forces the issue.”

In addition to answering these questions over time, I will be sharing images and stories of 36 items that I own. It’s 72 points of probing and revelation that I’m sharing with the world wide web.

Photo by Max Ostrozhinskiy



*To note, the 36 Questions are broken into three sets. I will be answering each question one at a time and in order.